Breathless

Sorry for being MIA last week. Apparently stress induced asthma is a real thing. I was having trouble breathing for three days. However some steroid treatment and a rescue inhaler later I am mostly okay.

Anyway in light of the recent events I'm going to talk about stress. It's amazing how stress not only effects our moods, but also those around you. It can depress you and it can suck the joy from those you love. Stress even makes you forget what makes you happy and building blocks of what fulfills you.

I've battled stress frequently in my life. Often I wonder why I let people and situations cause me such strife. So much in fact that my ability to breath is compromised.

So, I've made a very important decision to stop letting people and situations from having such a huge effect on me. Writing, story telling, photography, painting, and fiber art are what always brought me joy as a child. These will be the activities  I will strive to do more of. These are the activities I will strive to incorporate into the lives of those I love.

I believe we should all strive to think back to our childhoods and remind ourselves of those things that made us smile. Those things we ran home to do. The things we spent all day thinking about.

Happiness is not a far away concept that is unreachable. Sometimes to find that missing piece you simply have to strip away all the layers of what normalcy has led you to believe you want and look at a childhood version of yourself. Then you ask yourself what is fun.

Nervous Break Up

Today was an emotionally interesting day. It was mid level on my scale. Being blah is often a blessing for me as I constantly live on a roller coaster of debilitating sadness or extreme bouts of energy. It was nice.

On my to my apartment from my soon to be home I stopped and picked up some sushi. I used my evening of calm to soak in the rain as I watched fantastic displays of lightening. It's funny how much people fear.

Of course I fear a lot of things. Many many things, but not death. It seems the things that freak me out the most are so much less dangerous than the things I don't fear. I let myself think about these things because I like to figure things out.

The things that freak me out the most happen to be things that inconvenience others the most.

Proper behavior, broken light bulbs, scratched dvds, my hair falling out everywhere, touching, and a multitude of other things. These things make me nervous because they seem like things that just inconvenience. Even asking or accepting gifts or favors freak me out.

To correct this behavior is something I'm not quite sure how to tackle. Will correcting the discomfort I get from these things make a difference in my ability to interact with the world?

Top Five Benefits of PMDD

Being as I'm battling a monster head ache due to my monthly  this is as good as it gets this week:

The top 5 reasons I'm ok with my PMDD.

5. After the cramps stop I can sleep a solid 12 hours.
 Because I will deal with monster cramps to get me some non drug induced knock out sleep.

4.The fever that happens as a result of all the headaches seems make the Houston heat not so hot.
 Because Houston Heat=Satan's summer home.

3. I definitely can tell a day or two before my period  starts that it's coming.
 Because who doesn't like their own personal warning system.

2. Pity chocolate. Doubling over in menstrual pain gets generous donations of chocolate.
Because free chocolate rules.

1. Off day from work. Sometimes I feel so awful I have to call into work because standing is just not an option.
Because staying home is awesome even when you feel like crap?