Modern Feminism and How It Has Caused A New Age of Segregation

I find myself on the forefront of a battle I never knew I would have to fight. Growing I was very much a flower and frills kind of girl. I wore dresses and only dresses, picked flowers, played with barbies, and dreamed of two things. I dreamed of adventure and I dreamed of being a homemaker. While I have indeed adventured I have not known the joys of being making a house a home for my family. It truly is my only regret.

The problem, however, is not that I have dreamed and lost, but in the backlash I get from "feminists" when I reveal this. How is it progressive for a man to want to be a stay at home dad, but holding woman kind back when I want the same thing? Further more how is this building equality. To chastise me and other women like me for enjoying what is considered a traditional role. So what if it's considered traditional nothing else about me is traditional so why hate me for that one thing.

The great female freedom fighters of the past fought so that everybody, that means both women and men, could decide their societal positions despite gender and not because of. It isn't about me being a working parent because that uplifts women. It's about me being a stay at home mom because that uplifts me. Isn't that what Susan B Anthony, Carol Downer, Abby Kelly, and the ultimately wanted; for women to have the opportunity and power to uplift themselves?

The Begining Of A Begining . . .

I often get told that I am strong, courageous, beautiful, and a great parent. Even more often I feel I am none of these things, not even a comical misrepresentation.

Is it really important to be these things or even feel that you are these wonderful adjectives? It isn’t that I don’t understand some of the things I have survived and accomplished are out of reach for some people. It is more that I feel I can always do better. My little monster that constantly tells me I am not good enough.

Here’s the real kicker, I don’t even know whose measure I’m holding myself up to. What makes the things I do, love, and conquer subpar? I rarely stop myself to think about whom holds this impossibly long measuring tape I constantly attempt to surpass.

So I sit here and I ask my questions and rant my rages to anonymous few that dare to dip into my head. Tonight I feel as if I have found a little bit of clarity. The answer is I have become my mother. I was never good enough or successful enough for her tastes. I do not do things as they should be done or as they are socially expected. In turn that voice pecks at my already chemically imbalanced brains.

It isn’t that I haven’t come to terms with my abnormal personality or my overly whimsical views on every day. I most certainly embrace my ability to be delicately blunt and aggressively humorous. In fact I am so at ease with myself I can’t remember the last time I felt like I hated myself. I know at one point I did. I love myself. I love being a fat girl with huge curly hair. I love that I’m weird, liberal, conservative, self-centered, giving, logical, and fanciful all at once.

Then someone says “You are so strong.” and I lose my shit. How dare they? What do they know? If I am strong I wouldn’t cry all the time. Maybe in the end the statement doesn’t enrage me because I am not strong, but because it makes me accept that maybe I am good enough. That despite my self-perceived short comings and hyper critical nature I am more than that weird fat girl with the big hair. Maybe I wear my size and weirdness as a badge to stave away some inward need to measure up. If I embrace my flaws and never admit to being more than a short coming I cannot be wounded.

So Why I think Theaters Showing Nothing But 50 Shades of Grey Should Burn Down

Let me begin by saying IHATETHEBOOKSIHATETHEMSOMUCH. Yes that needed to be said in all caps with no spaces. Let us begin with why I hate these high rated books and this heavily anticipated piece of shit movie.

1. They depict an askew warped view of BDSM relationships.
This I can say with utmost confidence in my knowledge of BDSM relationships. I have explored in them, taken part in the community, and have retained a healthy friend base in the community.

2. The relationship is horribly abusive. It is amazingly, hugely, horribly abusive.

3. There is a point when things just become porn. Soft core porn, but it's porn. Perhaps that's why everybody wants to watch it. However I get my porn for free.

4. And the best reason of. Diversity people. Maybe there's an audience out there that wants to watch some thing other than a massively disappointing glimpse into a very interesting subculture.